Check Your Price Tag
This past year has been a season of fighting for what I want and defending my worth along the way. To be able to defend my worth I had to know the value of what I was defending and whom defined that value. Iʼve grown up in church my whole life and have heard the words like you are loved, you are worthy, youʼre Godʼs precious treasure, youʼre Godʼs beautiful creation, etc. Honestly, it sometimes sounds really cheesy especially when you donʼt feel your best self. Your body is out of whack, your face starts breaking out, and not even your holy grail skin care routine can save you. Any who, just ranting now. I got to a certain point where I started to question my worth. Why? Well I started allowing the voices of others feed the lies of the enemy. I allowed words of others carry more weight in my heart than what they had any right to. Iʼll never forget one day walking to my car where I felt the words so heavy that I experienced my first anxiety attack. When I got home I called out the devil on his tactic and rebuked it in the name of Jesus. I started speaking over myself and started to repeat the words of truth that I had once treasured in my heart but allowed the devil to taint. Iʼll never forget this moment because I felt it being a clear moment defending my worth against the enemy.
God wasnʼt done working on my heart about this. The past three years Iʼve worked really hard in my professional career. Iʼve taken opportunities that have stretched me but have pushed me towards my potential. It came time for yearly salaries to be reviewed. My new annual salary was not the salary I desired nor the salary I felt I deserved. I was about to have the awkward conversation about money that no one ever wants to have based off of performance assessments. Before walking into this conversation I prayed and prayed and prayed. I felt God say “what do you have to fear, donʼt you know your worth?”. He reminded me AGAIN that above all else my worth comes from my identity in Christ. In that identity I am confident, I am bold, I have favor, I have grace. He paid my price and Heʼs defined my value. Now would I choose to walk in my identity?
I later found myself negotiating not one but two different salaries. I got a new job offer at a different company with a higher pay of A% when I had proposed B% pay increase. The representative asked me why I felt I deserved B%. I told him my reasons based of market value and experience I had but his offer remained the same. At that moment my current employer had reached an agreement to increase my salary by B%. When the competitor employer found out about my new offer with my current employer they immediately proposed to match the offer of B% as well. They found a way to match the offer when they originally told me that was all they could offer. I was shook. Loll!
During the process of negotiating I could have easily settled for A%. After all, it was an increase right? I should be content with that right? But in the most humbling way, I knew I was worth more. What Iʼm trying to say is that both companies recognized my value and tried to pay the cheaper price. The enemy also knows your worth but wants you to underestimate your ability to fight as a child of God. There is so much power and authority within you.
By no means am I trying to disrespect any company. Thatʼs how corporate world works. You negotiate to get the most for the smaller price. Itʼs business and I respect that.
Above all, God is faithful and through all of this my new salary was a win for sure but the bigger win was that I learned that when you truly believe your worth, your value, and you know who you are, you donʼt leave room for any doubt or for anyone to tell you otherwise.
I heard the words in a message once focusing on the words in Genesis where God tells Adam “Who told you that you were naked?” where he first experiences shame and guilt. Who told you that you were less than? Who told you that you donʼt deserve better? Who told you werenʼt good enough? Who told you that you were exempt from blessing and salvation? Who told you and why have you chosen to believe that?
We allow the enemy to have more territory in the battlefield even when God already has already claimed the victory for us. Will you choose to proclaim that promise for yourself when the world and the enemy tells you otherwise?